Well, I tell ya, this whole marriage thing, it ain’t easy to figure out. You young folks these days, always in a hurry. But sometimes, that man of yours, he just drags his feet, don’t he? So, you’re probably sittin’ there, scratchin’ your head, wonderin’ why he hasn’t proposed. Let me tell you, it ain’t always what you think it is.
Sometimes, it’s plain and simple fear. Yeah, fear! Men, they get scared, just like the rest of us. Maybe he’s scared of messing things up, scared of the big commitment, scared he ain’t good enough. He might not even know he’s scared, but it’s there, deep down. It’s like when you see a big ol’ snake in the garden – you freeze up, don’t ya? Same thing with them sometimes.
Then there’s the “not ready” excuse. He says he ain’t ready for marriage. Now, that could mean a whole lotta things. Maybe he ain’t done sowin’ his wild oats, as they say. Maybe he’s got things he wants to do first, like get a better job or save up some money. Or maybe, just maybe, he ain’t sure about you yet. Harsh, I know, but it happens. You gotta ask yourself, when will he promise? Don’t just sit there waiting forever, girl!
- Maybe he’s just not sick of being single. Some men, they like their freedom, you know? They like comin’ and goin’ as they please, not havin’ to answer to nobody. They gotta get tired of that life before they settle down. You can’t force it, no matter how much you beg or cajole. It’s like tryin’ to make a pig fly – ain’t gonna happen.
- Maybe he’s got commitment issues. Some folks, they just can’t commit. They get scared of bein’ tied down, of havin’ to be responsible for someone else. It ain’t your fault, it’s just the way they are. You can’t fix a broken wagon wheel with just a hammer, you need the right tools, and sometimes, even then, it’s just busted.
And then there’s the fancy proposal thing. Maybe he’s dreamin’ up some big, romantic gesture, like in them movies you watch. He wants it to be perfect, memorable, the whole shebang. So he’s waitin’ for the right moment, the right place, the right time. Or, get this, maybe he’s tried to propose already but got all tongue-tied and nervous! Imagine that! Could be he’s workin’ up the nerve to try again. It’s like tryin’ to catch a greased pig – slippery and frustrating!
But let’s not forget, time plays a big part too. How long you two been together? Folks say it takes a year or three before gettin’ engaged, but everyone’s different. Some jump in quick, others take their sweet time. Life gets in the way too. Maybe he’s gotta focus on his job, or he’s worried about money. Or maybe, and this is a big one, he just ain’t personally ready. You can’t rush these things, like bakin’ a good cake, gotta let it rise.
And sometimes, he’s just plain confused about his feelings, or your feelings! He might not be sure if he loves you enough, or if you love him enough. It’s like tryin’ to read a book in a dark room – you can’t see the words clearly. That uncertainty, it can stop a man in his tracks. And that big word, “commitment,” it scares the bejesus out of some of ‘em. It’s a big step, after all.
So, what do you do? Well, first off, stop worryin’ so much. And don’t let them nosy relatives and friends get to you with their questions. You gotta talk to him, plain and simple. Ask him what’s on his mind, what he’s feelin’. Don’t be accusin’ or naggin’, just talk. And listen. Really listen. Sometimes, the answer is right there, if you just pay attention. It’s like lookin’ for your glasses – sometimes they’re on your head the whole time!
But if he keeps dodgin’ the question, or givin’ you wishy-washy answers, well, then you gotta make a decision. You can’t waste your life waitin’ for someone who ain’t ready to commit. You deserve someone who knows what they want, someone who ain’t afraid to say, “I choose you.” Remember, life’s too short to be waitin’ around for a maybe. You gotta be strong, girl, strong like an old oak tree.
Tags: [Relationships, Marriage, Proposal, Commitment, Love, Dating, Reasons, Fear, Timing]
